This was interesting to read. The conclusion gave me a little hope, but most of the essay seemed like denial.

I was the “white girl” growing up even though my community was 99% black. Being called white as a black person and not fitting in is no different, in my opinion, than not fitting in communities for other reasons. This is different than having negative-leaning views of your race (loud, ghetto, thinking you’re the exception).

I hope that you infuse a variety of blackness into the lives of your kids so that they know they know diversity exists and should be celebrated. I also hope your family stops elevating your husband’s perceived “blackness” over your own. It’s furthering the stereotypes you’re desiring to shake and kids pick up on these things. I wish you and all the other “white girls” well on your unlearning process.